Stress Tip: Smile for a While

 How was your week? Was it a productive week or was it one filled with frustration and stress? If I had to guess, more people experienced frustration than enjoyment. I hope that is not true for you, but I know in our culture there is a tremendous amount of stress.

I believe stress is really a code word for fear. When I say that I am stressed, it usually means I am fearful something isn’t going according to my blueprint for life. Stress (fear) can lead to all sorts of physical ailments. I have seen people worry themselves into an ulcer and even heart attacks.

So, if you had a stressful week or even a stressful month (maybe even a lifetime of stress), I have some simple solutions to improve your attitude. These solutions are so simple they seem almost silly. The only side effect is happiness or less stress. This is not better living through chemistry! No medication is involved.

A few years ago, there was a study that took clinically depressed patients through a treatment for 30 days and at the end, they had a 100 percent cure rate. They had clinically depressed patients stand in front of a mirror and smile for twenty minutes a day for 30 days in a row. Now it had to be a big smile, but that was all they did. (Sounds crazy or too good to be true!)

The key takeaway is “motion can lead to emotion.” Think about it for a few seconds. If I asked you to describe someone who looked depressed, what would they look like? Chances are they are slouched over slightly, face downcast, and not slow moving. We have all experienced this state of emotion. Now, consider someone who is excited or happy. What do they look like?

Try a little experiment. Make yourself looked depressed for a minute or two and see how it makes you feel. Now, try making yourself look happy or excited. How did you feel? Could you notice any difference even slightly? So, something as simple as paying attention to your body can change your mental state.

I have a challenge for you this week. Simply stand in front of a mirror and smile—a big smile—for about three minutes a day. If you have a big meeting, maybe before you go into it, smile for a while. I know it sounds crazy, but what do you have to lose? Let me know how you do!

If you want to take a deeper dive into this subject and other ideas for healthy living, take a look at my e-book, The Caleb Journey. Here’s what people are saying:

“This was a productive, useable, comfortable plan for me to follow. This plan is obviously based on successful personal and professional experience and knowledge in the medical, nutritional and sports fields, as well as in the spiritual well-being realm.” —Harry Brewer

“This 3-week challenge focuses on your spiritual walk, teaches you about your own body, and offers recipes and actionable tips to help you not only lose weight, but also find true happiness again.” —Shayla Eaton

Wishing You an Amazing Life,

Dr. Curtis Brown

What Is Your Purpose in Life?

WThe most popular book in the world is The Holy Bible. It has had more copies produced than any other book. The second most published book is not even close to the Bible. The second one, however, is fairly recent. It is The Purpose-Driven Life by Rick Warren.

Knowing one’s purpose is essential to living a fully productive life. If you do not understand why you exist, then you will have difficulty making good decisions about your future and even your present. You will be taken with the current of popular opinion and may end up in a place you do not want to be in.

Earlier in the year, we talked about what you want written on your tombstone. How do you want to be remembered? This really gets you thinking about your character and your influence. I think this is a good starting point (the end of your life) on understanding your purpose.

Everyone and everything has a purpose. Even if you do not believe in a Creator, honest people will come to the conclusion that everything has a purpose. If you really believe we evolved from some primordial mist, then the only thing that makes sense is that we evolve to a specific end or purpose. We cannot evolve, and it not serve a purpose or benefit. Everyone and everything is designed for some purpose or use. We may not understand it with our limited sight or knowledge today, but there are no accidents.

I believe we are uniquely created by a loving God and that we all have purpose or reason for existence. I believe God has created each of us to fulfill roles only we can. The roles may be similar to others, but they will be unique to each of us.

Our purpose for life may be experienced differently as we go through different stages of life or life events; but at the core, our purpose or reason for breathing stays the same throughout our life spans.

We are never too old (or too young, for that matter) not to have a purpose. Many of my geriatric patients struggle with why they are still alive. They often feel like they have completed their purpose for living. There are many reasons for this, but at its core is the belief that they are no longer contributing.

Our sense of worth often comes from our sense of how we contribute to society, especially our families. If we feel we are not contributing, then often we will feel worthless. Eventually, we feel worthless.

I was at both of my grandfathers’ deaths. I watched as they took their last breaths and watched the monitors flatline. To this day, I am still learning from them. I will compare myself to them when I am close to the end. They showed me how men end well. They never quit leading me. You are never too old or too sick not to have a purpose. You will always have a purpose as long as you have air in your lungs.

You must know what your unique purpose in life is! I want to challenge you to think about your purpose, your reason for breathing. And I want you to write it down. It does not need to be elegant or even elaborate. I think the simpler it is, the easier it is to understand and to follow.

I recently reviewed my purpose and wrote down thoughts as they came to my mind.

“I exist to glorify God in all I say and do. I do this mainly through helping others to improve their health and lives. I experience God most when I am serving His children and enjoying the outdoors. Learning is another common way I enjoy God. Therefore, I will be a lifelong learner who loves God and helps others on their journey.”

This statement is basically a filter for me when it comes to decisions about how I am to spend “my” (it is all His anyway) money and time. It is a fairly broad statement and leaves me lots of leeway, but it is still one of my first filters. The things I do and spend my time on need to fit with this in some way or fashion.

We all have a purpose and a unique design. What is yours? Don’t be shy: tell me in the comments.

Wishing You an Amazing Life,

Dr. Curtis Brown

A Simple Key to Happiness

Read the first three in this series:

The Most Important Thing about Trying to Lose Weight
Understand Your Why
Brain Hack for Weight Loss

Isn’t it true we all just want to be happy? Are you happy right now? Do you have healthy relationships? Are you financially ok? How is your health? Are you growing spiritually? How is your family life?

How you answer these basic questions often determines your level of happiness. I want to slow down and have you think about some really basic things I believe can increase your level of happiness.

We all have a basic understanding or belief about how life should be. We all have a blueprint, if you will, on how to build our lives. At any given moment, your sense of happiness is determined by how well your current situation measures up to your blueprint for life. Think about it for a moment. Think of the different areas in your life: financial, health, relationships, family, and spiritual. How happy are you in each of these areas? Rate yourself on a scale of 1–10. How happy are you?

Chances are if you rate yourself fairly happy, your current situation aligns well with your ideas on how your life should be. For instance, if your financial goals are to have six months of living expenses set aside for an emergency fund and you have achieved that goal, you probably have some sense of contentment. I would imagine you have other financial goals as well, but I hope you are getting the point I am trying to make.

Now if you are not happy in some areas of your life, why not? Chances are that area of your life does not match up with your blueprint. Well, why not? Do you feel loved and respected by your spouse? Are you growing spiritually? Why or why not?

Our energies flow to our focus. If you want to be happy, focus on what is important to you, your blueprint for life. If you are struggling in a certain area, it is probably because you have not been focused on that area of your life. Maybe you are a dad who is working hard providing for your family, but you are neglecting your kids and things at home are not matching up to your blueprint. Focus on the family; balance the work-family continuum. I know it is not always as easy or simple as I have made it sound. But I do know it is true: your energy will flow to your focus.

If you are not happy in an area of your life, stop for about 15 minutes today and develop a plan to change your focus. Write your plan down on paper or on your smartphone, and review it daily. It will only take a few minutes. It helps to start the time with thinking about two or three things you have to be thankful for. Develop an attitude of gratitude. In a couple of weeks, take the time and reevaluate your situation. Focus and adapt!

Now the real key to a successful life is to have a lasting blueprint for life. Make sure your foundation of your blueprint is laid on the Cornerstone.

Wishing You an Amazing Life,

Curtis Brown MD

Brain Hack for Weight Loss

Read the first two in this series:

The Most Important Thing about Trying to Lose Weight
Understand Your Why

I really believe most of us can do just about anything when we put our minds to it. Now, I am not talking about crazy things that are physically impossible like flapping our arms to land on the moon. It is a matter of focus and what we focus on.

In recent blogs, I have written about the importance of deciding to do something and then having a compelling vision of your future. This compelling vision should help you overcome in times of struggles, and the struggles always come.

Today, I want to give you a simple brain hack to help you in your struggles in the moment. But first, let’s talk about some ways to prevent getting into struggles.

Why is it we often find ourselves dwelling on the things we are trying to avoid? Adam and Eve had acres of good trees to choose from, but they seemed to focus on the forbidden fruit.

My friend Rick Thompson tells a story about teaching his young son to ride a bike. He found an open parking lot on a weekend that was huge, but it had a couple of light poles in the middle of the lot. His son kept saying he was afraid he would hit the light pole. Now, there were literally acres of parking lot free from the light poles. But what do you think happened? His son went straight for the light pole!

The truth is our energy will flow to where we focus. If you are trying to lose weight and you are constantly thinking about food, where do you think you will end up? Probably at the refrigerator or the cabinet where the chips and cookies are.

The Bible encourages us to dwell on what is good and pure and noble. Keep thinking about your preferred future. How will you feel when you drop the weight? How much more energy will you have? How will your self-image change? Write down your goals and benefits and review them daily. Get on the scale every morning and decide tomorrow will be better. Make it happen!

When you are in the moment of a struggle, and you must decide between pain versus pleasure, now versus later, what can you do to improve your odds? Most of us have patterns we have developed over the years. Our spouses and close friends can often predict how we will react to a certain situation. It is the same with temptations of all kinds. We have thought patterns that usually lead to a behavioral reaction.

The key is to interrupt the thought patterns. We have to disrupt the routines of our neuropathways. It usually takes some energy and action.

One of the things I will do is simply get up and move. Get a drink of water or take a look out of the window. Do something to change my focus.

Our energy will follow our focus. Change your focus. I heard of one guy who would pinch his nose and make a noise. It disrupted his neuropathway and changed his focus. It helps if you immediately think of something funny or otherwise good. This will start changing your neuropathways and with time, the temptation will lose its grip on you.

Decide, create vision, focus on the good!

Wishing You an Amazing Life,

Curtis Brown MD

Read Part 4: A Simple Key to Success.

Understand Your Why

In a recent blog, The Most Important Thing about Trying to Lose Weight, I wrote about the most important thing for improving your health and losing weight: simply to decide to do so. Over the years, I have found those people who have succeeded have chosen to make it happen. They are proactive and take responsibility for their own health and weight loss goals.

Again, the concept is really simple. First you must decide! If you are thinking, I will do this when I have more time or money or my situation changes, chances are you will never take action. Most of us are like water: we tend to go to the level of least resistance.

Deciding is the first step. Deciding is the most important thing, but it is not everything. I have decided and have started many things only to give up in a few short days or weeks.

To really stay with it when things are a little tougher, you must have a compelling reason, a compelling why. Remember, we basically make decisions based off of pain versus pleasure.

For me to stick with something, even when it is painful, I must have a compelling vision of future benefit or pleasure. The scale must be tipped to the pleasure side for me to decide in the moment. Now the problem becomes in the moment; if I eat this now, I will have some pleasure and relief of pain. I must have a compelling vision of future benefits that outweigh the current situation. It has to have more attraction, more benefits in my mind, than my current situation.

People who are successful at losing weight understand delaying temporary pleasure for permanent results will ultimately give them more pleasure. So, you must get a clear vision of your future desires. What do you think it will feel like when you have reached your goals? What health benefits will you have obtained? How much more energy will you have? How much better will you feel about your body?

First, decide it is important. You cannot move beyond this until you know that you know it is important. Next, create in your mind a compelling future vision. Write it down. Keep a journal of your thoughts and desires. This vision must be strong and compelling. You will need to draw energy from it when you are tired. Set a goal with a timeline and tell someone. Better yet, team up with some friends and journey together to better health.

Wishing You an Amazing Life,
Curtis Brown MD

Read Part 3: Brain Hack for Weight Loss.

The Most Important Thing about Trying to Lose Weight

I have had the privilege of helping thousands of people improve their health over my 25+ years of being a family doc. Unfortunately, I have also not been able to help many people. Oh, I can give them the necessary information and/or medications, but many people just seem unable to move the needle. They seem stuck in a rut or even worse, continue down a bad path to decline.

I have discovered a simple, basic principle that successful people have in common. It is so simple that many people will not believe me, but I know it is the truth. It is not hard to understand and yet so many are simply unable to do it.

The simple truth is people who lose weight or otherwise improve their health decide to do so! This is the foundation of making improvements in your life. You must first decide. It must become important to you.

People know they should do something. They know they could do something. How many times have you said, “I should lose weight or I should start eating clean or I should start exercising?” I have “should” all over myself at certain times in my life!

So, the simple dirty little truth to the reason you cannot lose weight is you have not really decided to do so. I know I will get a lot of push-back, but just hear me out.

I know weight loss is complicated and hard. Heck, I have been trying to lose the same 20 lbs. now for a couple of years. I know it is hard and I have planned and strategized to lose the weight and have had some success but not lasting.

The bottom line is I have chosen to be where I am today. The choices I have made have led me to where I am now.

We are basically binary people. Every decision we make is simply deciding between pain or pleasure. Think about it for a second. When you really decide something is important to you, you will find a way to make it happen. Now, I am not talking about unrealistic things such as swimming to Hawaii or flying to the moon.

The problem comes in the moment. When you are tired or stressed, your willpower is not as strong as it would be when you’re not so stressed or tired. In the moment, you chose to relieve yourself of the stress by eating something or doing something that is not so healthy for you over the long haul. You chose temporary pleasure to avoid the pain you find yourself in. Pain versus pleasure. This concept of pain versus pleasure is true in all areas of your life.

So, the first thing you must do is to decide your health is important to you. I found I have this natural tendency in me to judge myself by what I intend to do but to judge others by what they actually do! My intentions are turned into deeds, when I actually decide and take action. I really have not truly decided until I act. The road to good health is paved with good decisions and not good intentions.

If you truly decide to do something, I am betting you can find a way to make it happen. Next time, we will discuss more on how you move from good intentions to taking action.

Wishing You an Amazing Life,
Curtis Brown MD

Read Part 2: Understand Your Why.

Low on Energy? A Few Thoughts on Fatigue

One of the most common complaints I hear in my office is, “I have no energy. I just shouldn’t be this tired all the time.”

This seems to be pervasive in our culture.

If you simply search fatigue, you will get over 11 million results. There are also as many cures for fatigue as there are variations of this complaint. If you search for information on cures for fatigue, you will get over 9 million results. Clearly, this is an issue for many people.

There are many causes of fatigue. Most patients are convinced that their thyroid, blood sugar, iron levels, or hormones are low or not right. All you have to do these days is turn on your radio or TV and within fifteen minutes, you will probably hear a commercial for men about low T.

I do believe it is important to check on these things when appropriate, but rarely are these the cure for fatigue. Certainly, if you have low T or hypothyroidism, replacing these hormones can help with your energy, but most people have normal results.

Over the years, I have found the quickest fix for low energy for most people is to start an exercise program. “Motion is lotion.” You will simply feel better and have more energy. On the other extreme, if you are working out 7 days a week, taking a true Sabbath from your workouts will help.

I am also amazed at how little sleep many people get. We need to consistently get around 8 hours of sleep. Some people seem to do okay with 7 while other may need 9 hours of sleep. Those patients that routinely sleep less than 7 hours will usually push back against my suggestion for more sleep. They will usually say they have always only needed 5–6 hours of sleep. Of course, when asked how long they have been tired, they reject the association to lack of sleep to their fatigue even though they have been tired all those years.

Sometimes, the cure is more water. If you are chronically mildly dehydrated, it can cause fatigue. Our bodies are around 60% water. We need water!

Over the long haul, sugar is a zapper of energy. It will give you a quick burst of energy but usually leads to low levels of motivation and/or energy after the initial surge. Eliminate sugar and things that turn to sugar as much as you can.

I take a B-complex vitamin from Thorne Research called Methyl-Guard. It has B12, B6, and folate. I think it helps me. Whether it actually helps or if it is simply all in my mind, it works for me.

But the most common cause for fatigue that I have found in my 25 years of being a family doctor is stress. Stress comes disguised in many forms. Most people do not believe they are stressed. I think it is the “boiling frog” theory. They are so used to low levels of stress and as their lives get more complicated and stressful, they do not see the increase temperature of the water as they are slowly coming to a “boiling” point in their lives.

Our culture promotes stress. We have a tendency to get over involved in all sorts of things. Mostly, these are good things. Look at little league games these days. There was a time when a T-ball team would play 8–12 games in a season. Usually the kids would have the same hat and maybe T-shirt. Now, these kids are in $200 uniforms, and playing tournaments on weekends. It is nothing for an active T-ball team to play 35–50 games.

There is nothing wrong with T-ball. It is great for kids to be active and compete. What I see happening in our lives is lack of any margin. We cram as much as we can in our 24-hour day. When something unplanned occurs (and it always does), we have no margin, no breathing room, and that puts added stress to complete our scheduled activities such as work.

This often leads to stress in our relationships. Isn’t it true that we seem to take it out on those we love the most? Keeping our relationships healthy will dramatically improve our energy level. It will take energy to invest in those relationships, but we will get more back than we put in.

Another drain of our energy is the constant distractions that keep our minds buzzing with information. When was the last time you allowed your mind to be bored? With all of the technology that keeps us connected to our stressed-out world, we seemingly never disconnect. I believe one of the best “fixes” for fatigue is to disconnect and recharge your emotional batteries.

Disconnecting looks different from one person to another, but one of the keys is to allow your mind to get bored or at least not be distracted with all of the information we have available to us today. Take time to meditate. “Dwell on what is pure and noble.”

I have found exercise is one of the best ways for me to disconnect from the chaos and to recharge my emotional energy. Sometimes reading a good book will do the same thing. Take some time to figure out what it is for you that will help you stay emotionally energized. Plan for it and invest in it.

When your emotional energy is good, you will find your physical energy will follow. It may not happen simultaneously, but it will correlate. Allow your mind to occasionally be disconnected from all of the chaos we live in every day. The world will not stop rotating if you do not check in on Facebook or Instagram every day!

Wishing You an Amazing Life,

Curtis Brown, MD

Big Hairy Audacious Goals

Do you have a BHAG? BHAGs are Big Hairy Audacious Goals. They are something that will stretch you, challenge you, and make you get out of your comfort zone. I think they are essential for leading an amazing life!

I was in Chicago the first time I heard the term BHAG. I was listening to Bill Hybels speak at a Christian leadership conference. I’m not sure if he made up the word or if someone else did, but the word and the idea resonated with me some twenty years ago.

I try to set BHAGs for the four main areas of my life: spiritual, family, physical, and work. I think the best time to set them is usually at the first of the year or if you are going through a transition in life. I do like to review my goals every so often to see how I am progressing. I may not always reach my goals, but I usually fall forward trying!

I think having BHAGs are critical for living an amazing life. Having BIG HAIRY ADACIOUS GOALS will keep you focused and energized. I see so many people that are depressed or stressed out to the max; almost all of them do not have any direction or goals in their lives.

Having BHAGs will keep you focused outwardly (providing you set healthy goals) instead of inwardly all the time. They usually will give you a framework for making decisions. It helps you learn to say no to some opportunities that might be good but maybe not best for you. They usually make you learn a new skill or experience something in a different way.

One of my favorite memories of a BHAG was running my first marathon. I was never much of a runner and the thought of running 26.2 miles was overwhelming. With the help of some friends and encouragement from my family, I survived. I can still recall the feeling of crossing the finish line for the first time. I felt as if I could do anything that I set my mind to accomplish. I made new friends, learned a lot about myself in the process, and I am still running today.

Some BHAGs are easy to think of, while others are not so simple. I usually struggle with my spiritual ones. I think these are the hardest for me because I like to be in control. In all honesty, I don’t have a spiritual BHAG at the moment. I think spiritual BHAGs should be something big, something challenging, and something that I cannot do on my own. They should be so big, that the only way they can be accomplished is if God shows up!

So the next time you are feeling overwhelmed or anxious, consider your BHAGs. (Oh, by the way, you are never too old to have BHAGs!) Do you have something in your life that is challenging you? Are you out of your comfort zone (a little anxiety can be a good thing)? Do you have something in your life that is pushing you to become better? What are your BHAGs?

Do Anxious People Live Longer?

As I write this post, we are in the heat of summer here in Oklahoma. The heat index has been setting records this week. It has ben HOT!

The heat does funny things to people. I have seen a dramatic increase in patients suffering from essentially anxiety. Generally, they do not openly say they are anxious. It is usually disguised in a somatic complaint such as chest pain, dizziness, fatigue, or shortness of breath.

Anxiety is a part of human nature. Human nature has the tendency to take a thought and go to the darkest place with it. A headache can quickly become a tumor or stroke in some people’s imagination. I am not immune to this tendency.

A few years ago, I had a spell of vertigo. Vertigo will cause you to get dizzy with just about any kind of motion. For a few moments, I was convinced that I must have had a blood clot that would eventually lead to a stroke! To say the least, I survived, and it made me slightly more sympathetic to my patients with vertigo.

In the book The Longevity Project, the authors found that having a little bit of anxiety or concern correlated to longer life. They dismissed the theory that the happy-go-lucky guy lives the longest. It seems that those who have some level of anxiety tend to make healthier choices. For example, maybe they do not take that extra drink or start smoking. They are a little more reserved with their choices.

So it would seem that a little anxiety is probably healthy for you, but too much anxiety can make you ill. I have seen people worry themselves into ulcers or heart attacks. Proverbs 12:25 says, “Anxiety in a person’s heart weighs him down, but an encouraging word brings him joy.”

I think that anxiety and fear are very similar. Most anxiety is caused from fear of loss. We tend to be anxious when we fear loss of health or loss of an opportunity or loss of a relationship or loss of material things.

Some fear is healthy. For instance, fear of falling will keep most people from leaning over the edge of a tall building. Our fears do tend to set limits for us.

I have a slight fear of heights. Anything passed the second rung on the ladder is orthopedic height (you fall, you break!) for me. I will never work on a high-rise building. Fear of getting a speeding ticket and having my insurance rates go up keeps me from driving too crazy.

“The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom.” My fear (or respect of God) sets limits on my choices. It keeps me from doing stupid things. It sets healthy boundaries for me. It gives me a framework from which to make choices.

Some fears can be paralyzing. These usually occur when I have high levels of anxiety, or fear of loss of something. When I drill down on this, I find when I am overly anxious, I have placed that something in the center of my heart. It consumes me and becomes a horrible master. Anything in the center of my heart other than Jesus (the fear of the Lord) will tend to lead to some level of unhealthy anxiety.

I do think having some anxiety is just part of life. If you are human, you will have some anxiety. It would seem a little anxiety might lead to a longer life. The next time you are feeling anxious, do a heart check. Make sure that you truly have Christ in the center of your heart and I believe He will give you peace that surpasses all understanding.

Golden Years: Big Gain in the Future

Have you ever thought about how long you want to live? Most people I know want to live to a good old age as long as they have their mind and can take care of basic daily needs. Most people are more afraid of having a debilitating stroke than a crippling heart attack.

Nobody really enjoys thinking about our golden years and how we want to end our time hear on earth. Our future selves will thank us if we do start thinking and planning for our golden years. I had a patient tell me the only thing golden about his golden years was the front of his underwear!

The problem for most of us is that we are always going to start tomorrow, and tomorrow really never gets here. I judge other people by what they do, but I tend to judge myself by what I intend to do. I have really good intentions like learning Spanish, but . . . I will start tomorrow!

I want to encourage you today to start thinking about the “future you” and consider developing a plan to not only “go long” but to thrive. I do think it is possible to make some small changes now for big gains in the future.

I am currently reading a book, The Longevity Project, and have found it fascinating. It is based on a study started by Dr. Terman in 1921. He started following thousands of California children in grade school. He developed an extensive questionnaire for the kids, their parents, and their teachers. He wanted to look at personalities and see which ones tended to be more successful in health and life. He followed them until he retired and then others took up his work. All of the participants are now deceased.

The main takeaway from the book is that “Personality is an excellent predictor of health and longevity, often in counterintuitive ways.” It was not the carefree, "enjoy life, grab all the gusto while you can" personality type that lived the longest or for that matter was the happiest. “The findings clearly revealed that the best childhood personality predictor of longevity was conscientiousness—the qualities of a prudent, persistent, well-organized person, like a scientist-professor—somewhat obsessive and not at all carefree.”

Our personalities are difficult to change, but with some thoughtful effort we can make some differences. I tend to be an introvert. (My family may say to the extreme.) I can, however, function as an extrovert. It is not my natural self, but I can pull it off for a while. I think the same is true with other parts of our personalities.

I want to encourage you to think about your golden years and start coming up with a plan.